It will never be like before.
Okay so I totally stole those words from Kanye's new song "See me now" which if you haven't heard yet is quite the lyrical genius that we used to love from Ye until he went and sold his soul to love by dropping 808 Heartbreak. But I digress...
The whole purpose of that quote is because I had a dream last night. A dream where I was a young, beautiful 20 year old again who somehow/someway thought I was fat at a size 4 in college (this part was totally true) but then I flashed forward and saw myself in like 7 years time and realized I better enjoy it while it lasted!
Long story short, it will never be like it was before. As you age your body changes immensely (Hello perky breasts and goodbye in a blink of an eye). When you're young, adults always tell you "Enjoy your youth and not paying bills while you can"! Well, I have a new plan. Whenever I decide to have children I will simply tell them "Enjoy that endurance you have now because as you age you won't have it anymore, so keep talkin slick". Seriously. Our bodies are like cars, we'll never fully know how they operate but we can atleast try to fix them.
So today was day 5 of fitness bootcamp and WOW! L & I made it through week 1! I can't say I'm THAT proud of myself, I mean, I'll be proud when I've made it through Week 8. I will celebrate then by buying workout clothes (hopefully a bit smaller) from Under Armor. I love their stuff but I'll be pissed if I spend the money on it now and it's all baggy a few months from now.
I'm actually kind of sad that I won't have to get up at 5:30am tomorrow morning and run or jump or lift weights or ...wait. No I'm not. However, L and I are planning on a long walk with her dogs this weekend. =)
OVERALL PROGRESS THIS WEEK:
Remember how yesterday I said I wasn't sore? Well, I woke up today singing a new tune. In fact it was so hard to move my arms in the shower! I struggle today at bootcamp but I realized I was actually doing EVERY exercise even if it was only for 20 or so seconds. I didn't skip one!
I dunno about all of you out there who exercise but I'm VERY self conscious. I find myself stopping in the middle of an exercise to pull down my shirt or pull up my pants...It's like I can't have any part of my body parts exposed. This is NOT good. Body image. Body image. Body image. Ugh. I dunno but I gotta get over it somehow. That's something I have to pull from within. I am getting better at the exercises, still not where I'd like to be but ...I'm coming along. L brought her mother along today and that was nice. She was a cheerleader! It was great to see her looking out and smiling. Now I wish my mom lived here.
I'm in a weird mood so I think I shall end this for now!
Love you all and you know how much I appreciate all of you for checking in and reading!! I gotta keep doing it even when I don't feel like it because if I don't...I know I'll give up...and failure is NOT an option!
Until Monday (unless I check in over the weekend)....light and love!
Sidebar: Why am I just now realizing how GREAT bananas are when mixed with granola and milk? Insane. I'm like a 5 year old learning new things.
If you have a few seconds and want to check out some great music, check out my girl Lissie from my hometown and High School! It's a great song for those of us struggling with something and just trying to push through! - Lissie - Everywhere I Go (Live)
It's truly an amazing song and her entire album is banging! Would love it if you go and see her October 22nd at Hiro Ballroom in NYC! She truly is an amazing talent! The song is powerful!